The Compulsion to Prove oneself
Burnout begins in a seemingly harmless way with exhilaration towards one's work. While many sensitive strivers can relate to their ambition being a positive trait that supports their career growth, inner drive in excess can stifle one. It morphs into a compulsion to prove one's worth to oneself and others. You don't feel "good enough," so you take on additional responsibilities and always feel like you need to be doing more, faster.
Working Harder
As you say "yes" to more assignments and tasks, you realize that you can't fit everything into normal office hours. As a result, work begins to bleed into your personal life. You may answer emails on the weekend or put in 10 to 12-hour days to stay on top of your to-do list. You still find your job fulfilling, and you actually get a jolt of satisfaction when you're praised for your dedication. At the same time, work begins to feel like an addiction and you have trouble switching off or disconnecting in the evening.
Neglecting Needs
As a sensitive striver, you may default to prioritizing others' needs ahead of your own. But this goes a step further in Stage 3 of burnout. You may:
Sleep variably
Skip meals
Stop working out
Forget to spend time with family and friends
The effect? Your health takes a hit in the form of weight gain, insomnia, decreased focus, and more.
Displacement of Conflicts
Your excessive focus on work leads you to dismiss obvious conflicts and issues happening around you. Deep down, you know something isn't right, but finding a solution or making a change seems too overwhelming. Instead, you avoid thinking about your concerns and refocus your attention on your professional obligations. But suppressing your feelings results in feeling more jittery and panicky. You find yourself overreacting to small setbacks and slights.
Revising Values
You begin to realize that you've strayed from what's most important to you. But instead of facing that reality, head-on, you simply update your moral compass to be solely focused on work. Friends, family, and hobbies take a backseat. Self-care is dismissed as trivial. Your entire self-worth is derived from your productivity and accomplishments.
Denial of Emerging Problems
Now that your values have changed, you begin to butt heads with others. You might perceive your colleagues as lazy or your clients as too demanding. You become increasingly intolerant, unempathetic, and cynical. You blame time and work pressure for your stress, instead of recognizing how you've changed.
Withdrawal
During this stage, you pull back from relationships. You probably can't remember the last time you had a conversation that wasn't about work. Your social life feels small or nonexistent. You seclude yourself and may escape through guilty pleasures.
Impact on Others
Your burnout is now concerning your family. They notice how you've become impatient and irritable. You may do things that impact others, like forgetting to pick up your child from daycare or missing a meeting.
Depersonalization
You feel like a shell of your former self. Depersonalization involves feeling detached from your own body, as if you were now an outsider watching your life. Every day is an exercise in going through the motions. Whereas you once felt enthusiastic about your work, you're now negative or indifferent towards it.
Inner Emptyness
You no longer see yourself as valuable. You start to feel worthless as if all your effort is for naught. You've lost your drive and daydream about quitting, moving, or leaving your career. You may turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms such as overeating or alcohol to further numb yourself.
Depression
Everything becomes a blur. Life was once technicolor, but now it's gray and bleak. You're emotionally and mentally exhausted. You feel lost and unsure. Work feels completely devoid of meaning or purpose.
Full Burnout Syndrome
Full Burnout Syndrome occurs when you reach a breaking point. Your body may collapse or you have a mental breakdown. At this stage, medical attention is necessary. Many professionals find that they need to take extended leave from their job in order to heal.
Take a moment to reflect. What stage do you see yourself in? This is important information and a call to action to act sooner rather than later. It's important to remember that burnout is not a linear process. You don't always go from one stage to the next and the time spent in each stage can vary.
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