The Give skill is especially important for maintaining healthy relationships through effective communications.
There are four main components of the Give skill: being gentle, showing interest, validating feelings, and using an easy manner.
Being Gentle
Being gentle is the most crucial component of the Give skill. It involves using a gentle tone of voice, avoiding attacks, threats, and manipulation. Here are some ways to practice being gentle:
- Use a slower pace when explaining your requests or needs.
- Use positive words instead of threats or demands.
- Avoid using facial expressions or body language that convey anger or irritation.
- Practice tolerance and give the other person the time and space to respond to your requests.
Showing Interest
Showing interest is the second step in the Give skill. It involves listening and demonstrating that you are engaged in the conversation. Here are some ways to show interest:
- Maintain eye contact with the other person.
- Nod or smile to indicate that you are paying attention.
- Avoid interrupting or talking over the other person.
- Ask questions to show you are interested in the other person's points of view.
Validating Feelings
validating feelings is the third step in the Give skill. It involves acknowledging the other person's emotions and perspectives. Here are some ways to validate feelings:
- Use phrases like "I can see that this is difficult for you," or "I totally understand how you feel."
- Validate the other person's thoughts or feelings about the situation, even if you disagree with them.
- Allow the other person the space to calm down and self-reflect.
Using an Easy Manner
Using an easy manner is the final step in the Give skill. It involves maintaining a positive and friendly attitude. Here are some ways to use an easy manner:
- Use humor or lighten the mood to make the conversation more enjoyable.
- Graciously accept the other person's response, even if you disagree with it.
- Remember that the other person's response is valid, even if they seem hurt or upset.
By practicing these skills, you can become more skilled in using the Give skill in your relationships. It is important to balance the three elements of the Give skill: being gentle, showing interest, and using an easy manner, to achieve the best results in your relationships.